By Gary White, winner of the 2015 Buda Public Library short story contest
Oct 21, Lackland AFB
Dear Dad,
Just a short e-mail to tell you about recent events here. I finally got the rest of my uniforms back from the tailors after getting my Staff Sergeants stripes sewed on! No more daily trips to the laundry mat to get my one set of fatigues (with my poorly sewed on stripes) washed. My sewing skills suck!
I also got a new assignment yesterday. We have a dog that just returned from Afghanistan. She is a Belgian Malinois with a beautiful fawn coat and a black muzzle. Her name is Gussie and I’ve attached her picture. Isn’t she adorable? I have the unpleasant task of determining if she is fit to return to duty. Her last handler in the Gahn said she was uncontrollable in combat situations.
Gussie and I spent yesterday afternoon getting acquainted. She seems to tolerate me, but that’s about all. However, she did respond well to the voice and hand signal command test I gave her. We went to see the vet this morning and while she is fit, he felt she is getting a bit pudgy and could lose a few pounds. This afternoon she didn’t do well in our noise and distraction test. Poor girl, she was shaking like a leaf.
Please say a prayer for Gussie.
Love, Ric
Gussie had been trained as a Military Working Dog or MWD with a specialty in smelling explosives, IEDs, and even the smells of chemicals used in printed circuit board manufacture for things like timing devices. Her acute smelling enabled her to detect explosives and devices with less than two or three parts in a billion.
What I didn’t tell my dad about was the intense level of rocket and mortar attacks Gussie had been exposed to in her six months in Afghanistan. Six weeks ago, while accompanying her handler, Army PFC Ed Silva, on a house-to-house search they came under a severe rocket attack. PFC Silva was mortally wounded and his body was returned to his hometown of Tucson where he was posthumously awarded the Purple Heart and buried with full military honors.
Gussie, outwardly unharmed, was paired with another handler, but it was clear the rocket attack and loss of her handler, Ed, had somehow inwardly affected her training and discipline. She was declared unfit for duty and had been shipped back to the MWD facility here at Lackland.
Gussie had initially been trained here so I reviewed her training records. Nothing abnormal was in them. In fact, she had been an exceptionally quick learner in all of her courses during her primary MWD training. I understood the trauma of losing her handler, and it appeared she was still undergoing posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and likely depression over the loss of her handler.
My challenge would be to reach Gussie on her level and try to help her through this crisis.
Oct 28, Lackland AFB
Hi Dad,
Gussie and I seem to be making some progress. We had a great day on the obstacle course today. One of the hardest tasks, coming down a ladder head first starting from a 50 foot platform, was a piece of cake for her. I thought I even saw a twinkle in her eye when our training leader, Master Sergeant Lewis gave her a ‘well done Gussie, you too Sgt McKay!’
But we still have a long road ahead of us and I’m not sure there is enough time. She has lots of fear when exposed to mortar, rifle and pistol fire. I’m doing something I’m not supposed to do. I’m taking Gussie to my apartment at night. She won’t sleep with me, but wants to be in the same room. MSgt Lewis seems to know, but he is turning a blind eye. Everyone here seems to have a soft spot for her as she is timid and shy but makes friends easily and loves her belly rubs.
Please say a prayer for Gussie.
Love, Ric
Gussie was still having troubles with loud noises and I was beginning to feel like we wouldn’t make it through the evaluation period. It was really bothering me if she didn’t. If her psychological exams were okay she might be put up for adoption. If they weren’t, then she might become a candidate for euthanasia.
Although she wasn’t meeting my level of expectations, she seemed to be more comfortable and responsive with verbal and hand signals. My immediate goals were to bond with her and earn her trust so she could tolerate combat environments. Our early morning rituals of belly and ear rubs and nose nuzzling had expanded to a series of rough play and friendly nips and squeals. She still won’t sleep in my bed, but puts her paws up on the side of the bed when the alarm goes off and stares at me until I get up.
At the end of week two, MSgt Lewis called me into the training room to discuss our progress. As usual, he was pretty blunt; “Sgt McKay, I’m rooting for Gussie just as hard as you are, but if there isn’t better progress by week four, we are going to have to reevaluate her as unfit for duty.”
Nov 1, Lackland AFB
Dear Dad,
Gussie and I went down to the Riverwalk for Halloween. She was the center of attention. I kept her initially on a tight leash, but as she got used to the crowd, the noise, and the costumes, I was able to let her walk loosely leashed at heel and we had some good practice with hand commands. She really responded to the kids and let them pet and hug her. But whenever an adult got to close to me you could see her hackles start to lift off the back of her neck.
Yesterday was not a training day, so I took her over to a private shooting range near my apartment. We sat outside for awhile and after an hour of hearing the muted pistol shots, she began to calm down. I gave her a few unauthorized treats (Ding Dongs) and then we went in to shoot. She stayed at heel while I went through a box of ammo with my Glock 17. Afterwards we went back outside and I gave Gussie Say a Prayer for Gussie 5 some food and water and we sat at the picnic table. She seemed much better with the loud sounds but wouldn’t leave my side.
I also found out Gussie likes to run. We go to the park and she runs with me while I get in my five mile runs three or four times a week. Then back to the apartment for a bath (she gets the hose in a plastic kiddie pool outside). Next week we will be doing more training and some more psychological evaluation. I haven’t weighed her, but she seems to be thinning down and her coat is really shiny now.
Attached is a picture of Gussie and me on the obstacle course.
Please keep Gussie in your prayers.
Love, Ric
Week three had some ups and downs. The vet, Major Bonner, said Gussie was in great physical condition and had lost a few pounds (she now weighs 78 pounds). He also felt her stress level was much better, but was worried over the back and forth pacing she has recently started. He thought it might just be a coping mechanism to her PTSD, but he asked me to keep an eye on her pacing and to let him know if it becomes more pronounced.
Yesterday, MSgt Lewis told me I might be getting orders to go back to Afghanistan soon. I was somewhat expecting this as I had been back in the states for ten months and expected to rotate in a few months, it just surprised me that it comes now when I’m working so hard with Gussie.
Gussie is still pacing in my apartment at night. She seems to calm down and sleeps some once I go to sleep, but I hear her get up three or four times at night and pace about my apartment for 10 or 15 minutes. It’s like she is trying to stay on guard and protect the both of us. I have been able to get her to stop with a heel command, but then the next time she wakes up she begins the pacing again – sometimes she whimpers while pacing. Very disturbing – I just hope we can make it through the evaluations MSgt Lewis has lined up for us next week.
Nov 10, Lackland AFB
Dear Dad,
Well it looks like my stay back in the states may come to an end sooner than I thought. I got my orders to rotate in six weeks. The assignment is still undetermined but it will definitely be back to the Gahn.
Gussie has started sleeping with me. For the past two nights she has slept all night and has become much calmer. Except in the morning. She seems to sense just before the alarm goes off and puts her face right into mine. Just as the alarm goes off she starts licking my face (what a comedian) and wants to play. I’ve had to bump up my wakeup time about half an hour so we can get the playtime in and still make it to the base on time.
We went through the first day of a three day evaluation the day before yesterday with flying colors. Gussie ran the obstacle course in a near record time with no errors.
Yesterday we worked in both leashed and unleashed explosive detection with a team of four trainers simulating an IED detection team on patrol with me as her handler. While there were a few hiccups, she stayed on task and got an above satisfactory score.
Today, well – not so well. The command testing under battlefield conditions is Gussie’s downfall. She started shaking and whimpering when the first mortar round went off, and couldn’t finish her first battery of verbal and hand commands. MSgt Lewis let us repeat the failed command exam and she got a marginally acceptable score. MSgt Lewis just walked away shaking his head.
Please keep us in your prayers; you are certainly in mine.
Love, Ric
MSgt Lewis and I reviewed the evaluations from week four and the failed and marginally satisfactory battlefield command test. He then asked me if I thought she would be able to continue, which surprised me.
I didn’t respond right away. While I’m still concerned about her fear of loud noises, I felt she was able to cope, although last night she resumed her pacing around the apartment. Although I’m supportive of Gussie, I could tell, like me, he had his doubts and was prepared to pull her from retraining.
Finally he looked me in the eye and said, “Ric, how well she does or doesn’t do her job may mean the difference between you or your team mates coming home someday or not.”
After hearing that I said, “If we have to make a decision today, then we need to pull her from training, but if you can give us two more weeks, I think she will be 100%.” It was one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever made, but I felt at the time it was right. Sgt Lewis said he understood and would get back to me with his decision. Later that night he called me on my cell phone and told me we had one more chance and he gave us almost four weeks instead of the two I had asked for.
Nov 18, Lackland AFB
Dear Dad,
I’m looking forward to seeing you for Thanksgiving. I asked MSgt Lewis if Gussie could come home with me so we could continue training over that weekend. He really surprised me and said he had already cleared it with our commander.
Yesterday we went to the shooting range after work. I usually sit outside with Gussie and she has a few treats and gets calmed down before we go inside to shoot. A man was walking by and he accidently tripped on a rough spot in the pavement and fell down just as a loud volley of shooting went off inside the range. Although Gussie became nervous, she stayed at heel on my command. I was really proud of her. I helped the man up and he and Gussie shook hands and he admired her, especially after he found out she is a MWD. She is such a lush puppy for attention.
Gussie’s final evaluations have been set for the week after we back from Thanksgiving. Please say a prayer for Gussie.
Love, Ric
The week before Thanksgiving was really busy. During the drive home to see my dad for Thanksgiving, Gussie slept in her crate and seemed to tolerate the long car trip. Of course Gussie and my dad got along famously. Dad even helped me continue with some of her training by acting as one of my team members on mock search missions for IED materials.
When Gussie and I left to go back to San Antonio Dad and I both got kind of choked up. Gussie was giving us both kisses and trying to tell us everything was all right. I’ll sure miss my dad and this is likely the last time I’ll see him before I deploy in January.
8 Dec, Lackland AFB
Dear Dad,
Well we did it. Gussie and I made it through her final evaluation today without a hitch. All of the squadron, including our commander and the vet were there to see her graduate. When it was over, MSgt Lewis made a small speech about how Gussie had already served and was going back to Afghanistan to join an IED team. At the end of his speech I was a mental mess. While I wanted her to pass, I also knew it meant the end of our working together.
Then surprise, surprise. The commander came forward, called everyone to attention, and presented me with the Bronze Star medal for my last tour in Afghanistan. But the biggest surprise was when he told me that I would be teamed up with Gussie when I get back in country next month.
Dad, it just seemed like Christmas came early this year, I’m so happy.
Please say a prayer for Gussie.
Love, Ric p.s. I also found out we are leaving on Dec 28. The flight to carry Gussie leaves the same day I do, but we should connect in country on or about January the 8th as she has to go through quarantine for 7 days and I have a 3 day layover at Ramstein AFB in Germany.
January 9, Kabul – the Gahn
Dear Dad,
Gussie and I went through in-processing yesterday. The vet gave her a clean bill of health after her quarantine. Tomorrow we fly out to forward operating base (FOB) Quebec to join our unit in Qalat, Zabul Province. I’m told our mission is investigating tunnels in the district for Taliban supplies and Say a Prayer for Gussie 11 weapons. Gussie seems to know she is back in the Gahn, she is alert and I’m confident she will do a great job.
MSgt Lewis had me and Gussie over to his house for Christmas. He acts like a Lou Gossett Jr. gruff guy around his family. Everyone tolerates his act but his three teen-age daughters manipulate and play him like a fiddle. His wife, Jackie, is a nurse at the children’s hospital in San Antonio. She was crying when Gussie and I left. I guess seeing us go back into a war zone really hit her close to home. We had a great time and they all gave me a bunch of presents. I felt bad, as all I’d thought to bring was some wine and a plate of homemade cookies.
I miss you a bunch and hope you got the Christmas presents I sent you before I deployed. All of your presents arrived before I left Lackland, and my favorite one is the picture of you and Gussie in front of the homestead. It’s proudly displayed on the stool next to my cot.
Please keep us in your prayers.
Love, Ric
January 29, Ramstein AFB
Dear Dad,
I’m sure you have been kept aware of what has happened, but here it is in my own words.
Gussie and I were on a mission with five of my team mates. We had finished investigating two tunnels and were in our Hummers returning to our base when Gussie started acting real nervous. We stopped the Hummers and I got out with Gussie to try to calm her down. About that time our team leader saw a suspicious object by the side of the road some 50 yards ahead.
Gussie and I were sent to investigate it. It was an IED decoy placed there to get us to stop. Gussie didn’t go on alert with the decoy, but she sensed something was wrong and jumped on me and knocked me to the ground just before the first mortar round hit. My team mates had been watching from the Hummers and were all well protected.
Then the firefight started in earnest. I was kind of in a daze but held onto Gussie and tried to get us back to the Hummers. I’m sure Gussie detected the trap and her acting up certainly saved all of our lives that day. I found out the rest of the team made it back to the FOB with no injuries.
Well the rest is pretty much a blank until I woke up here in the hospital. The docs say I was lucky as my flack vest absorbed most of the shrapnel from the initial mortar blast. But I know better. It was Gussie who took the blast and saved my life. No one here seems to know what her status is. If you can, please contact MSgt Lewis at Lackland. If anyone can cut through the military back channels, he can. Dad I so hope and pray Gussie is okay.
I am on the mend, doing rehab for the shrapnel wounds to my legs, so please don’t worry about me, but please, please say a prayer for Gussie.
Love,
Ric
I recalled a bit more than I let on to my dad. As we were crawling back to the Hummers, Gussie was bleeding from numerous shrapnel wounds. I guess we were easy targets as I could see puffs of rifle rounds kicking up the dust and sand around us as we tried to crawl back. Several times I rolled on my back and fired back at the mountain ridge where the rifle shots seemed to be coming from. Every time I did, Gussie would keep crawling a few feet and then turn around, bite my fatigue jacket collar, and pull me closer to the Hummers. When we were about twenty feet away from the Hummers, I felt a large cloud of darkness close in on me, just like we had had a really fast sunset. The docs say it was the loss of blood as I was hit in an artery in my leg with some shrapnel.
Two of my team members ran out and pulled me and Gussie back to the safety of the Hummers and then they worked on me while reinforcements and a med-evac helicopter were called in. I didn’t even remember the helicopter coming in for us, but one of my team members later emailed me and said I wouldn’t get on it unless Gussie went with me. He said they lost track of Gussie at the field hospital and no one seems to know what happened to her.
I was in and out of consciousness on the helicopter ride to the field hospital, but I remember Gussie was there – whimpering and licking my face. She was hurt really bad and I tried to get the medic to quit working on me and take care of her. The medic on the copter gave us both a look that made me want to get up and kick his ass and tell him, “Gussie is going to make it, she’s not a quitter, don’t you quit on her, you cocksucker!” Maybe I said it, I don’t know.
The rest was really a blank until I woke up in the Ramstein hospital. The docs said my heart had stopped on the operating table in the field hospital due to the lack of blood and shock. But they were able to get me ticking again and then stabilized me into a controlled coma for the C-17 flight from Kabul to Germany.
No one here at Ramstein seems to know or care about Gussie, I just hope my Dad can find out something from Sgt Lewis. After my daily rehab I make a trip to the chapel here in the hospital. Somewhere Gussie is alone and afraid. I pray that somewhere, someone is watching over Gussie.
Epilog
From the San Antonio Express newspaper, March 5, 2013.
In an emotional ceremony today at the Brooke Army Medical hospital, USAF Staff Sergeant Sharon Rica McKay (known as Ric to her friends) was presented the Bronze Star with Valor (2nd Oak Leaf cluster) and the Purple Heart for her actions in Afghanistan earlier this year. SSgt McKay is undergoing rehabilitation for leg wounds suffered in a mortar and rocket attack and is expected to make a full recovery. Her father, retired USAF Chief Master Sergeant Ricardo McKay, from Pecos, Texas was in attendance as well as several members of her former unit which trains military working dogs (MWDs) for all of the branches of the military at Lackland AFB.
Her former supervisor, Master Sergeant William Lewis, read the citation for the award of her second Bronze Star, which said, in part, “…although critically wounded and in total disregard for her own life, SSgt McKay continued to lay down suppressing fire while protecting her team mates and her MWD Gussie, who was also critically wounded. The actions of SSgt McKay and MWD Gussie allowed her team members to take defensive cover and maintain control of the extremely dangerous situation.”
At the end of the award ceremony, MSgt Lewis made a small speech about the bravery and courage that military working dogs perform every day and that Gussie, in particular, performed on the day SSgt McKay was wounded in combat. At the end of his speech he called everyone to attention again.
Then a door opened behind the stage and Gussie walked out to the center of the stage and greeted Ric for the first time since they had both been wounded in combat earlier this year. SSgt McKay’s stoic military demeanor buckled and collapsed as she and Gussie began hugging each other.
Sgt Lewis explained, although severely wounded, Gussie was treated by a medic, TSgt Simpsa, who was stationed at the field hospital in Qalat. Coincidentally, Sgt Simpsa was also the same medic who treated SSgt McKay on her medical evacuation flight to the hospital after the firefight. While Sgt Simpsa didn’t initially think Gussie would live, he and his fellow medics and field doctors nursed her back to a stable condition before sending her to the MWD veterinarian facility in Kabul.
There wasn’t a dry eye in the auditorium as both Ric and Gussie were reunited for the first time since their separation in Afghanistan. Sgt Lewis further stated that, although Gussie’s wounds are healed, her physical condition as a result of the combat wounds she suffered have rendered her unfit for further service as a MWD. MSgt Lewis then asked SSgt McKay if she would consider adopting Gussie.
With tears streaming down her face, all Ric could do was fiercely nod up and down in the affirmative and bury her head in Gussie’s mane.