I’m a bit confused about that college that Donald Trump built. They call it Trump University, but I’m not too sure where its campus is situated. I am somewhat a fanatic when it comes to college athletics. Well, at least football and March Madness basketball. And I have a good knowledge where most campuses are located, at least which state they’re in. But it seems Trump U flitters around the country like a band of gypsies. At one time Trump University showed up in Texas, probably hoping to join the Big 12, but we can only have one TU ’round these parts. So Dean Donald and his school got the boot from the Lone Star State.
Just how big is this here Trump University? And does it have a football team? Last fall, I watched a lot of small schools play ball since certain Texas college teams sucked worse than a turbo-charged Hoover vacuum. Not once did I see Trump U play Louisiana Tech or Appalachian State. What conference is Trump U in? Definitely not the Big 12 or the Southland Conference. They play too close to Mexico for Trump to attend a game.
And if Trump U does have athletics, what is its mascot? With Trump’s infatuation over big walls, I wonder if his school’s athletes are the Mighty Masons, or perhaps the Burly Bricklayers. Marshall has the Thundering Herd. Trump U could have the Toxic Cloud as its team nickname. ‘Bama is the Crimson Tide, so Trump University could be the Orange Orator. How about the Blabbering Buffoons with the mascot dressed in an expensive business suit and having an overinflated head beneath a tacky red gimme cap?
