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Thursday, March 5, 2026 at 10:10 PM
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Living dignified while memories fade


By Kim Hilsenbeck.


The memory care unit at Orchard Park Memory Care and Assisted Living in Kyle smelled like a grandmother’s kitchen, the scent of oatmeal raisin cookies wafting through the air.


Stephen Catoe, memory care director, baked them up earlier in the morning. It’s just one of the little touches he and other care partners do to make the facility comfortable and homey.



“Smells are memories,” he said.


The Assisted Living (AL) section of the facility opened in October; it currently houses 20 residents. The memory care unit has seven residents and opened in February. 





Using validation therapy, Stephen Catoe (below), the Memories in Time Coordinator at Orchard Park in Kyle, helps seniors be the best they can be by finding out their focus and abilities. Life stations, such as the workshop shown above, provide a place for residents to build and create. Another life station offers a baby nursery to address the need to nuture. The facility’s care partners also use music, art and other techniques to reach those who need cognitive and memory care. Catoe said it’s about taking everyday things and making them extraordinary. (Photos by Kim Hilsenbeck)


In addition to common areas with nicely appointed furniture and décor, the facility has a beauty shop, gym, life stations, outdoor patios, fireplaces, memory boxes outside residents’ doors and art on the walls. 


Catoe’s official title is Moments in Time Coordinator. He explained the program of the same name he rolled out recently.


“It’s based on honoring the paths of life; you take everyday things and make them extraordinary,” he said. “Meals are known as dining experiences.”


The dining room table linens create a sense of elegance.


“We have something called ‘Stroll to Dine.’ Unless they absolutely must be in a wheelchair, we ask residents to walk to dinner,” Catoe said. 


Care partners also transfer residents to a dining room chair.


“It’s a matter of dignity,” Catoe said. “They sit up straighter, they participate in the meal more.”


With his more than 15 years of experience, what he likes about Orchard Park is that memory care was not an afterthought. 


“It’s as important, as big, as beautiful as the assisted living side,” he said.


One criteria for being in the memory care unit is if it’s unsafe for that resident to live alone, for example, if they tend to wander outside and are unable to ask for help.


Executive Director Jenny Castillo said residents on the assisted living side need more physical assistance, where memory care residents require cognitive assistance.


Catoe said the other facilities where he has worked concentrate on providing care. 


“Most places can meet physiological needs, but [here we] really have the goal of helping each person be the best they can be that day. We do that through finding out their abilities – we do a biography on each person.” 


He pointed across the room.


“You’ll notice that beautiful painting over on the wall,” he said. “One of my residents did that abstract. It’s like something from a gallery.”


After working in the field for so long, Catoe said a big lesson was everyone is different.


“One thing I was told in this business was if you know one person with Alzheimer’s, you know one person with Alzheimer’s.”


He smiled.


“Everyone has their own journey,” he said.


What else makes this facility different?


“We teach Validation Theory, created by a social worker named Naomi Feil,” he said. “It’s widely accepted in Europe. It’s gaining popularity here. I’m a certified validation worker.”


He explained the training philosophy.


“Feil identifies ‘Phases of Resolution.’ You’ll have mal-oriented people – not really disillusioned, but they’re in that awareness that something is wrong. Then the majority of residents are time confused. As you lose your memories, you lose them chronologically going backward so you may be at any age or any time.”


Some residents are essentially reliving their younger years.


“One phase that’s rather advanced is repetitive motion. You’ll see some people constantly wipe or pat,” he said, demonstrating the movements on his armchair. “Usually what that tells me is there is not enough stimulation.”


What addresses their needs?


“We really need to find out their focus. If it’s someone who used to sew, maybe you see them messing with their hem or buttons [on a shirt]. Maybe they need something to work with.”


 “You have to know that person as an individual,” Castillo added.


The validation therapy, Catoe said, along with Life Stations, are used with residents. Those stations include a nursery to help address the need for nurturing and a workshop to allow residents to built and create.


“There are techniques we use to reach that person. Our job is not to shock somebody back to reality,” he said.


 “The staff begins to look for things that in other [facilities] may have been called behavioral issues,” Catoe said. “Somebody pushing an alarm and saying they want to go home – why would we call that a behavioral issue?” he asked rhetorically. “Why would that be unreasonable? That’s not unreasonable to want to go home.”


He said asking a resident about his or her home can be an effective tool to reach them.


A resident Catoe called Miss Donna whizzed by in her wheelchair, using her feet to propel the chair forward. 


“Donna is ambulatory. She’s a kinetic person,” he said. “She needs to move. We’re teaching pacing – we slow down or speed up to their pace.”


She completed roughly 15 laps during the interview.


“Our goal is to keep them as independent as possible,” Catoe said.


Orchard Park’s activity director, Thanh-Tu Nguyen, plans events for facility residents, including family nights, musical performances and holiday luncheons. Residents from the memory care and AL units get together quite a bit.


“We attend a lot of what goes on in AL,” Catoe said. “We don’t keep people locked away.”


Next month, Catoe will turn an outdoor patio into April in Paris.


He is also hosting an Alzheimer’s education class support group for caregivers and family members April 17. The class is free and open to the public.



Next week read about Rem and Dolly, residents at Orchard Park.


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