By Kim Hilsenbeck.

I have been happily married for 13 years to a good guy. He’s handsome, rugged, smart and funny. Sure, he has some flaws but that’s for another story.

But all this time, I’ve been cheating on my sweetie. Not with another man – with my favorite love, chocolate. Oh, that sweet, sensuous lover who is always there, never criticizes and always fulfills the promise of satisfying my desires. My desires for really good chocolate, that is.

I’ve been with chocolate longer than I’ve been married. In fact, I’ve known chocolate since I was a child. Fondly I recall drinking hot cocoa, roasting s’mores and enjoying Hershey bars at Halloween. Skittles? Gum drops? Candy corn? I think not.

Then as I got older, I discovered another one of my temptations, chocolate with liquor inside. As a teenager, my mom and I found champagne-filled chocolate truffles imported from Switzerland in a New York City shop. They melt in your mouth as the little pocket in the center delivers that delicious poof of ooey gooey champagne. They are exquisite.

She still sends them to me each year at the holidays and I still love them as much as I did all those years ago.

I crave the smooth flavor of chocolate pudding and chocolate mousse. I seek out restaurants that serve chocolate bread pudding and chocolate pie, and at home I mix batches of chocolate brownies and chocolate chip cookies.

I’ve been known to order a chocolate martini (or three). Drizzled with chocolate sauce and topped with sugar-rimmed edge, these babies are pure bliss. 

But alas, this attachment to the cocoa bean and its delightful by-products has several negative side effects and consequences. If the expanding size of my jeans doesn’t give it away, surely the excess flab in multiple areas of my body sheds light on the truth.

Why is this love affair so ever-lasting? What is it about chocolate that I’m unable to let go, even though I am married to the love of my life?

Well, for starters, chocolate stimulates the release of oxytocin, the hormone that promotes bonding and inner peace. The feeling is remarkably similar to the release of that same hormone when you’re in love and feeling blissfully happy. And it just so happens to be released when men and women have “the big O.” 

That marital bliss can be difficult to sustain over the long-term. Chocolate, especially when it’s high in cacao, gives that feeling of bliss – even if temporarily.

But chocolate is not a good substitute for love. Or vice versa, I say.

Chocolate facts

In researching my favorite topic and secret love, I found some interesting historical facts. So pour yourself some hot cocoa, curl up with a box of bonbons and enjoy. Then go find your sweetheart for a little spontaneous oxytocin.

• The origin of the word chocolate can be traced back to the Aztec word “xocoatl;” it referred to a bitter drink that was brewed from cacao beans

• Theobroma cacao is the Latin name for the cacao tree and means “food of the gods”

• Research suggests chocolate has been around for three to four thousand years

• In pre-modern Latin America, cacao beans were used as currency. Can you imagine walking into H-E-B and paying with M ‘n Ms?

•  The Aztecs and the Mayans, ancient civilizations that lived mostly in modern day Latin and Central, thought the cacao bean had magical – some say divine – properties. I, too, believe chocolate is divine.

• Once sugar or honey were added to the bitter drink, it became very popular among the European elite

•  Chocolate was largely a privilege of the wealthy until the invention of the steam engine in the latter part of the 18th century, which made mass production possible

•  In the United States today, manufacturing chocolate is a multi-billion dollar industry 

•  Each month, the average American eats about a half pound of this delicious treat. Also, the United States is in the midst of an obesity epidemic. I’m not sure if that’s a coincidence.