By Charlotte Winelmann
Children and teens are creating and sharing information more than ever using digital media and phones. They send text messages, use Facebook, Instagram and Twitter, write blogs, share photos and video to stay in touch with friends and family and to make new friends. Although social media offers lots of opportunity to help your child and teens be creative and stay connected and informed, it is important to learn about the different technologies and how your children use them so you can help keep them safe online. The social media landscape changes quickly, so parents should learn about the technologies your children and teens are using and investigate their use.
• Learn how your children communicate with friends online.
• Keep computers in common areas where you can watch while your children use them. Be clear about the rules for using the computer and set limits on the amount of time and how they can be used.
• Set limits on phone use. Talk about when it’s a good time to use a cell phone and review phone manners.
• Teach them the value of “unplugging” from devices and computers for technology free time. Reinforce that no e-mail or message is so important that it can’t wait until the morning.
• Get online protection for your family. Programs that provide parental controls can block websites enforce time limits and monitor the websites your child visits and their online conversations. Tell your children and teens that you are monitoring their online activity. Be aware that some parent control programs will block information about puberty and sexuality that you might want your teen to look for.
• Ask your children and teens about the people they “meet” online. Showing genuine interest will help them feel comfortable talking about it. Explain that it’s easy for someone on the Internet to pretend to be someone they are not.
• Discuss what’s okay and safe to post online and what isn’t.
• People can’t always control the information others post about them. Explain that information and photos available online can turn up again years later and how to report inappropriate use of the information posted. If you notice a suicide threat from an online post and you have no idea who may have posted it, reply with the Suicide Hotline number: 1-800-273-TALK (8255). Students and adults get a skilled, trained counselor at a crisis center in your area 24/7. The Hays HopeLine will be open most of the summer on the Hays CISD website.
• Ask your children and teens where else they access the Internet. Talk to teachers, caregivers and other parents about YOUR rules for social media.
Cyberbullying: Just as some people are bullied in real life, people are bullied online. Bullying is a manipulative and hurtful action people use to control others to make others feel bad about themselves or hurt them. It happens in many ways: by sending mean messages, by e-mail or posting them in an online forum or by sharing photos and videos without permission. Discuss cyberbullying with your child and talk to them about the importance of advocating against it. If you child is being bullied online and it doesn’t stop, is violent or sexually explicit or your child gets scared, your child needs to talk to you so you can report it to the police or Sheriff’s department. Hurtful rumors or gossip that is posted can damage a child’s self-esteem. The Attorney General of Texas has great resources at this website: https://www.texasattorneygeneral.gov/teens/resources/bullying.shtml.
Sexting is used to describe sending sexually explicit messages, photos or videos between cell phones. It can also happen using e-mail or on social media websites. Tips for help for keeping your child safe from sexting:
Remind your child that words and photos posted online can easily be shared among many different people.
Remind your teen that nothing is ever really deleted online. Friends, enemies, parents, teachers, coaches, strangers, and potential employers can find past postings.
Because people are not always who they pretend to be online, talk about the importance of keeping online friendships in the virtual world and how it can be dangerous to meet online friends face-to-face. Make it clear that if your child wants to meet a virtual friend in person, it must be with a trusted adult.
If your child or teen is playing online games, join them (even if only to sit and watch) so you can see exactly what they are doing and talk to them about it.
It is important that Hays CISD and your family work together to ensure your child is safe, especially in their use of the internet, phone or other cyber devices.