EDITORIAL
Arizona Governor Jan Brewer signed into law SB 1070, which is one of the nation’s toughest immigration bills to date. The new law gives local law enforcement officials the right to arrest anyone they suspect is in the country illegally, and requiring that anyone stopped must provide proof of citizenship. While state officials say they are training law enforcement officials in the ins and outs of the law to avoid racial profiling, many protesters believe the contrary. They say the bill gives police too much power, allowing them to arrest anyone without a warrant, if the police officer has probable cause to think that someone is here illegally.
So, how can the police know if a Canadian is here illegally? A few tips should help. After all, law enforcement officials say they will not be doing racial profiling. Canadians, beware!
Officers, you should automatically stop anyone in Arizona who has skis strapped to the top of their vehicle. And, when you stop them, ask a question. If the response ends with “Eh?”, lock ‘em up! If they ask “aboot” something, instead of “about” something, they need to be taken in!
Ask them to empty their pockets. If you find them packing loonies and twoonies, do not pass go, just take them straight to jail.
If a search of their vehicle produces not Starbucks’ cups, but Tim Horton coffee mugs, book ‘em.
Canadians, the police are after you. Change your ways, get rid of those skis, divest yourself of those $1 and $2 coins, and make sure you speak ‘merikan Ainglish.
Otherwise, you might find yourself being shipped out.
(Arizona WAS talking about Canadians, eh?)
